We know that helping those who are in trouble is always regarded as a traditional chinese moral. However people have to know when the need is just for some minority`s[mai'nrti] benefit and against most people`s interests, or when it is immoral or illegal, people should not hesitate to say no. But today I will not talk about this. What I will say is just about our daily life. Sometimes it is necessary to say no just for ourselves as well as for our loved ones. For example,when your best friend ask you to go shopping, but you are really tied. It is ok to say no. when your friends seek your advice on their clothes,it is okay to tell your real fellings if they look not very good in those clothes. Firstly,I want to talk about why the word “no”is so difficuilt to speak out. Some people do not like to say no to anyone.In my opinion, that`s because they want to make everyone happy. They think if they refuse others` demonds,they will be hated and alienated ['eiljneitid]. They are more unconfident than warm-hearted. On the other hand, it is easy to fall into the “if I don`t do it, no one will”trap.Yeah ,sometimes that`s true but more ofen than not,if you say no ,someone else will step up. If we always say yes to others,we may fell very tired and exhausted. we may want to be treated the same as what we do;we may take on a variety of responsibilities. But we are not supermen. So try to say no sometimes. Secondly,I want to talk about the benefits of saying no. Saying no will give back to you more energy and more time. There are only 24 hours in a day, but from now on, more of them are for you. It gives you more confidence. Saying "no" to others can often amount to saying "yes" to yourself. It also gives you more control. Saying "no" means you are behind the steering['stiri] wheel and can go wherever you want. You also gain more respect. You'll respect yourself more and so will others. They might not like you as much, but if they were trying to step over your boundaries before, they probably didn't like you much, anyway – not really. At least you'll have their respect when you show them your clear, no-discussion limits. All in all,more fun. Yes, life is here to be enjoyed. When you stop working for others, you start working for yourself and start fitting in the fun. Thirdly ,I`ll share how to tactfully say no.Does saying no to so many requests sound harsh? You can put it mildly. For example ,you can say : I am trying to focus on finishing off some other things. Sorry but it isn`t my strong suit. That is to say, I `m not good at it. I am sorry ,but I have an emergency to attend to. If necessary, you can say directly: I really don`t enjoy doing that kind of activity. At last ,I want to say ,we must consider the importance of requests carefully.