.楼上的那个完全是改错了= = 人家时态好好的.
第二行,beacasue,应该是because
第三行,对的,first改firstly+“,”会比较好;然后应该jump better and farther,不是longer.
we were asked to be ready= =.这里有一个准备的过程,be ready 十分生硬.改get ready.
!后面,it was my turn.轮到我了.没有it turned to me这种说法.
.后面一句.I looked at the pathway(更具象一点,通路而不要泛指“路”) and had my first try.
Practice makes perfect.没有the
然后初中作文的话这样改就可以了,要求没必要更高了.
