当然有.日前不是已经帮你解决了类似问题了吗?还要写另一篇?
没有“account budget ”这个词,
最后一句可改为：I planned my budget in view of my financial situation.
全文可改为：When I did my own budgetary evaluation,I found I'm short of money.I'm in great need of it,in fact.My mother has realized my financial embarrassment.And it's true.But I believe I'll get over it if I can find a job.It's very necessary.So I am hunting for a job immediately.My father adviced me to work as a bank clerk first.Due to my present situation,I'll look for a job to earn money as soon as possible.